Jennifer's Journal

I had to go get a cone biopsy done to see if I have cervical cancer. I just got back in from my post op appointment and the results are great. I am cancer free!!! Yay!! I am still choosing to get my hysterectomy done though just as a preventative type of thing. I also will be getting my newest counts and my regular check up next month as well. I have great hopes that my counts will be great. Also saw a great vid by Regan Hofmann http://www.youtube.com/user/Italkbecause#p/c/5/uUT6u35ARg8 very very powerful stuff. She makes me want to be more like her. Awesome job Regan!!

I haven't been around here much because I have been trying to find a doctor who would take both of my insurances to get my hysterectomy done. Thanks to my RN at my HIV clinic we finally found one. After finding the doctor I had to start the process of getting done what all the doctor needed first before doing a hysterectomy. I am almost done with all that now just one more procedure, a cone biopsy, to check to see if my displaysia is malignant or benign and then I get the final surgery. YAY!! I know it may seem a bit weird to be happy about that, but at this point it will be a relief when it is all done, though it does suck that the surgery will happen during the summer.

Another reason for me not being around here is that my little munchkin is nearing the end of her Kindergarten year (two more weeks!!),and the end of the year is very very busy. Then you add on meetings I've had to have because we had her tested for learning disabilites and it is just crazy lol. The results of the test weren't the results we had been hoping for, but we will deal with them. They just mean she'll get the help she needs to get her where she needs to be. At least I know she will for sure be going to first grade.

Meanwhile my T-cell counts have been great, my viral load undetectable, and I've been a non-smoker now for almost 6 months (just a couple of weeks away from that mark). My allergies still take a lot out of me, but I haven't had to use my rescue inhaler once in the last couple months so that's awesome.

Here is a recent pic to share with y'all.

There was an article on Poz magazines site about stigma not that long ago ( http://www.poz.com/articles/how_stigma_kills_hiv_2416_17574.shtml ). I was so saddened when I read both the article and the comments. I knew there was stigma, but I didn't realize how very very bad it still is. I have been extremely lucky that honestly I have encountered very little stigma in the last 10 years. The only place I have encountered it was from one of my brothers and even he is now coming around. There were some that commented that they were encountering stigma from their medical professionals, and I was so outraged and confused by this that I sat and cried for these people. One would thing that medical professionals would know better. The article also covered about positive women having babies and what people in general thought of that. The overwhelming consensus was against it. I'm so glad that when I was pregnant I didn't encounter those people because I might not have had my beautiful little girl.

I am now even more determined to not keep silent about being positive and I'm going to keep spreading awareness every chance I get. I hope the little bit that I do, and that others like Tom do, will make it easier for people to not feel they have to hide their status, and will let them know they are not alone we are all in this fight together.

I hope the holidays found everyone happy and healthy. Unfortunately I can't really say they found me that way. The down side to having a child in school is they get exposed to all kinds of germs. So far this school year we have had H1N1 twice which was not fun. The first case we had wasn't too bad just lasted a couple of days, but the second case was awful we were all sick for a full two weeks. It could have been worse though at least none of us had to be hospitalized. We were lucky that due to my status we were all able to get Tamiflu which helped with the symptoms. Then I had a couple of colds and my allergies started acting up. My allergies got so bad that I was put on an inhaler, nose spray, and allergy medication.

I do hope this New Year will be a great one I know everyone could use a great year. Mine other than the allergies has started out pretty good. I am finally divorced so now my other half and I can get married. It has taken 7 long years to get to this point I'm just glad my other half has been so patient and loving during this time. I am quitting smoking with the use of medication so that should help with my health a lot.

I have been really busy lately with my munchkin starting school. This is her first week and so far so good. She seems to really enjoy herself, but I find myself at loose ends while I try to adjust. I'm used to having her here for me to take care of so this is a big change for me.
I did go a couple of weeks before she started school to get my check up. My T-cell count is at its highest yet at 505 and I am still undetectable on viral load. So that was great news for me and made me very happy. I had to start a new med though for peripheral neuropathy because my feet are getting worse. I got lectured for not actually telling my doctor about it before. The only reason I said anything this time was my other half was there and made me tell him. I don't know why I didn't want to tell him about it other than I just didn't want to add another med to my daily routine. I also had been having issues with spasms in my back when I turned certain ways. My doctor checked it and apparently some how I strained a muscle in my back. So I've been taking muscle relaxers to try to help it relax and get back to normal. They seem to be helping a lot with it and the spasms aren't nearly as bad as they were. Thankfully that's just a temporary problem that will hopefully be fixed when I'm done with the muscle relaxers. So that's my wonderful update of what's going on in my world lol. Have a wonderful day.