So here is an update... I know it's been a while since I have written, but honestly I needed some time - some time to reflect, some time for me to be me.

I am healthy! I should always be thankful for that and thats why I lead off with it in this entry. I am also pretty happy, as I look upon my 1 year of being a flight attendant, I am also reflecting that this is my fifth year of being positive. It was five years ago this summer that I was infected and it will be five years in October that I know that I was infected. Five years have come and gone so quickly.

Recently, a very good friend, someone I love dearly told me they found out they were positive. I have mixed feelings about this - of course I will always be supportive but at first I was frustrated that they would be infected after knowing what I have gone through the past five years, but on the other hand, I know what its like to be in their shoes and I completely support them and will always be there for them. It's hard to help support someone so close to me I think, I have support - gosh - so many people in the last five years but never someone so close to me, so it's been hard for me actually.

On my personal front, Bryan and I have been together nearly nine months - so this month I am moving in with him. It's been a rocky road at times - but what relationship isn't right? We have a lot to learn from each other since we have been brought up much differently. This too had been a hard adjustment - I've tried using my blackberry less and start listening more - both things very hard for me at times lol. I went to my five year reunion. That actually was a fantastic time - at first I was scared at how people might treat me with my positive status lingering out there but it actually was no problem and everyone embraced it and what I have done the past five years. SO I am very happy for that.

All in all, things are well. CD4 is in the 600's and no viral load - I am glad I moved and in return my job is going well - just hoping things continue to go well and that I continue to speak at schools - I really enjoy doing that and I get asked to do it alot. I'm always excited to speak to people about it.

Congratulations to Teniecka - she had a baby and both are doing well. :)

Tom

This is an essay by Paloma Reynosa. She wanted to quote a phrase I made during the Global Youth Leadership Conference in an essay to Summer College Program. Her essay is below and I am proud to say she was accepted. Thank you Paloma for your kind words and your inspiration to understanding my important message.

Tom -



We were five hundred anxious teenagers, waiting for our guest speaker to arrive. We knew his name but had no idea who he was or what he looked like. Three minutes passed. Nerves began crawling into our bodies; no one was at the podium. Suddenly, a young man, sitting among us, stood up with a microphone and said as he walked to the podium, “I’m just like you. I act like you, I dress like you, but I am different from you. My name is Tom Donohue and I am HIV positive. ”
Through the course of history the inspirational thoughts of intelligent men have been recorded. It was difficult to choose just one quote out of my many favorites; however, I have chosen one in an unconventional manner. Last summer, I was nominated to attend the Global Young Leaders Conference in Washington D.C. and New York City. It was a life changing experience, not only because of the quality of the program and our culturally diverse student body but because of our extraordinary guest speakers. Our second guest speaker, Tom Donohue, was the most inspiring. He is an extraordinary person. Tom Donohue is the founder of a non-profit organization called “Who’s Positive?”. “Who’s Positive?” is dedicated to encourage our youth to be tested and know their HIV status. When faced with adversity, he decided to take initiative and do something about it. He accepted the consequences of his condition and took responsibility for his actions by advocating HIV and AIDS education and status. The more knowledge we have, the better perspective we have on our purpose for living. The moment he said, “Knowledge equals power and with power we can change and influence the world,” those words have never left me. They represent the values that my parents have always instilled in me.
Mr. Donohue’s words are not completely original. In my philosophy class we studied Francis Bacon who said, “Knowledge itself is power”. However, the way we use our power is more important, which is what Tom Donohue passionately believes in.
I know that whatever I might decide to be, or do with my life, I want to receive the very best education. The better prepared I am, the more I feel ready to take on challenges. This world is full of obstacles. It might seem that at this moment a sixteen-year-old girl might not be able to make significant changes in the world. I have not gone through experiences in life that would make adults take me seriously. The more educated we are, we can make better choices in life. What is our purpose for existing? The purpose of our existence is to help others in need.
If I want to make a difference in our world, I need to prepare myself by acquiring knowledge. Knowledge is one of our main tools in life. We can lose our money, our house, our car, everything, but we can never lose our experiences and education.


Thank You!!!
Paloma

Dear Friends, colleagues, and advocates;

In twelve days, I will celebrate my 29th birthday. This year also marks the fifth year of living with HIV and dedicating my life to raising awareness among youth, humanizing HIV through my firsthand account of living with HIV and using my voice to encourage my peers to empower themselves to be tested for HIV. These efforts are highlighted through my work reaching out to tens of thousands as founder of Who’s Positive. (http://www.whospositive.org)

Today, I wanted to share a story of a friend of mine who I met during my years at Penn State. His name is James, he has been trying to raise money for AIDS Walk New York and is currently at 60% of his goal of $1,000.00 goal. Today James sent out an email talking about his Uncle. Well I don’t know if you know, but I am a very proud Uncle of three, Elizabeth, Daniel and Matthew. James’ email talked about his relationship with his Uncle and it make me think about how my relationship with my niece and nephews. They are young, and just recently they had an opportunity to watch me on a television show called “Call The Doctor” – it was re-airing on tv and they unexpectedly saw it. My being infected has not really been introduced to them as of yet for the most part. As I sat here and read James’ email it made me think of them. How as much as I am a proud Uncle, I hope and pray that they will never face my death due to HIV/AIDS and that they themselves will steer clear of putting themselves in danger of contracting HIV. As much as I can hope, I hope that in our lifetime this terrible disease will come to an end and they will not have to remember their Uncle as the Uncle who was HIV+.

On the upcoming eve of my 29th year of life and the fifth year of living with HIV I ask of you a personal favor – rather telling you the good things that Who’s Positive is involved with I ask that you please make a donation to James’ efforts (which benefit directly a great well respected organization called Gay Men’s Health Crisis), make your donation in honor of Who’s Positive or of someone you know but please donate $5, $10 or more dollars and help recognize the hard efforts of people fighting this fight across the country. I thank you in advance and ask that you forward this email onward asking your friends to help. Donate here - Follow This Link (https://www.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=262058&supid=202790547)

With James’ permission, I share with you his personal story. I ask you help his efforts.

Tom,

I've probably sent you a ton of e-mails asking for either your support financially, or through volunteer efforts for this year's 2008 AIDS Walk. Some of you quickly jumped at the opportunity to donate, or volunteer your time, while others scratched their head and thought to themselves (and sometimes even said to me), "Why do you care about the AIDS Walk?"

Aside from the fact that I am employed at AIDS Walk New York, I would like to share my reason with you. Growing up, I had ups and downs that were pretty dramatic for a youngster to go through. I need not search for pity, but I can tell you that I saw things that some people never see in their entire life. With that being said, I do not remember a lot from my childhood, and the things that I do remember are fairly traumatic. But the few positive memories I have I cherish, and one of those positive memories involve my Uncle Troy, my mother's brother.

My mother's side of the family is Italian and Native American. My uncle was so dark, as dark as my grandmother, and I remember thinking when I was younger, "Am I adopted?" My mother and I are so light, how did her brother and her mother end up so dark? Nevertheless, when I was around 5-6 years old, I had an intense obsession with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Those characters sort of became my escape from the world around me. In a world surrounded by drugs, prostitution and a lot of violence, these 4 turtles represented a fantastical world of possibility full of fun words like, "Totally", "Dude", "Radical" and tons of pizza, plus they had a fun talking rat mentor named Splinter!

Since I really only had my mother, who was struggling her own issues, I really didn't have anyone to share my teenage mutant ninja turtles with. Most of the kids in my neighborhood weren't doing so well themselves, and I escaped through TMNT as well as my homework. But my Uncle Troy started picking me up from school and letting me hang out at his house after my mother got herself into some trouble. My Uncle and Aunt went out and bought me life sized turtle dolls and we would sit in their living room battling it out with the 'terrible' foot soldiers. I remember very little beyond that, but I do remember the last 2 times I spent with my Uncle.

Sitting in a truck with my mom, he explained to me that he had acquired a disease. I didn't understand it much, but he told me that if I was afraid to hug him, I didn't have to. My mom cried. I just sat there, I couldn't grasp what was happening. My Uncle gave me a kiss, and I don't know why, but I thought that I was 'supposed' to feel weird. I didn't, but he had mentioned that some people were afraid to touch him.

The last time was at my Uncle's funeral. He was cremated. I remember the beginning of that day like it was yesterday. I remember holding strong until my grandmother arrived and had to be held up by family members as she walked towards the funeral home. I remember running in the bathroom and crying. And then I don't remember much beyond that.

I walk because today my family has rebuilt themselves. I walk because we no longer struggle with being poor, we no longer have to worry about the shame of ducking below the couch when rent-a-center drives by. I walk because I watched my family pick themselves up after my Uncle Troy pass away, if not for themselves, then for him. I walk because one of my favorite memories that I can actually remember is with my Uncle Troy.

I send this to you so you understand why I ask for your support. If you can't donate anything to the walk, register yourself. Raise money on your free time. Come volunteer at the office. Every little bit count.

I thank you that you've given me the opportunity to share a very personal story with you in the hopes to motivate the people I know can truly make a difference, my friends, family and loved ones.

Follow This Link to visit my personal web page and help me in my efforts to support AIDS Walk New York

What a day. I mean literally.

Today, Bryan and I flew to Wilkes-Barre, PA to take part in a one hour TV show called Call The Doctor. I really wanted it to be an awesome experience for both Bryan and I - since Bryan ,well this would be his first real exposure to the work that I do with Who's Positive. Honestly I just wanted him to experience it with me and be there.

It was awesome. We flew into PA and we started off by going to lunch with the producer of the show - she took Bryan and I out to lunch which was nice and then we took a nap - it was nice actually since we had been up since 3am. We both got up, got all dressed up in ties too (thanks Bryan mwah- he hates to be in a tie but he looked SOOO good :) and went to the studio. After being introduced to folks and getting make-up I sat in the audience to start off, it actually worked out really well. Prior to the show I got reunited with my old PA doctor, who is also the Director of the Infectious Disease Dept at Geisinger Medical Center in PA. He's awesome and quite honestly it was a great start to the evening. We caught up and honestly miss him - really miss him being my doctor.

The show went real well - in the next few weeks we will post it on our website for everyone to see. Over all the day was perfect, Mary Theresa was a fantastic host and Bryan and I ended up going for a walk and having a night cap prior to me writing this entry.

As for him and I, things are going well, in just a few days we will be together for 5 months. I know thats not all that much time but - honestly I'm really happy. He's a few years younger than I am (29 this month!) so I think there is an adjustment - heck I recall when I was his age, I guess its that committed - what happens in your life affects me now type of thing and with our jobs it makes a bit difficult but for the most part I really enjoy his company - I really look forward to getting home from flying to see him. I dont think he knows how much I care about him but as we mature as a couple and we continue to get to know each other he'll know.

A shot out to a few people tonight. First Bryan - no not my other half but the gentleman who came to to the show tonight. He's followed my work and even had the POZ Magazine article from 2005 that he asked me to autograph - I thought that was funny, but I really felt like in some way I was an inspiration to him, so kudos to him and thank you for coming tonight. Shout out to my mom and grandfather - two people who watched tonight from a far (the comfort of their homes in Williamsport, PA) It was nice to hear their support and sorry Mom - they didn't get you on air (she tried to call in) Finally, besides Dr. Foltzer (who I again really miss as my Doctor) I have to give a shout out to Todd, my best friend. Tomorrow he goes in for surgery on his back and will be in the hospital for a few days. I am sorry I can't be there with you but hang in there. Todd is a very important member of my family, honestly he's like a brother to me and means a lot - he also does all my website stuff so I use and abuse him and probably don't give him near the credit he deserves. So tonight I thank him for all he does and wish him best tomorrow.

Thanks to everyone who watched tonight and feel free to comment!

Tom

March 17, 2008

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

HIV/AIDS ACTIVIST TO APPEAR ON "CALL THE DOCTOR”

At age 28, Williamsport native Tom Donohue knows he is HIV positive. He also knows that half of all new HIV infections will occur in people younger than 25. In 2003, he established Who’s Positive, a national organization dedicated to AIDS/HIV awareness. By sharing his story, he believes he humanizes HIV and helps others understand the need for the prevention of HIV infection.

He will share his story on Call the Doctor in the WVIA-TV studio theater on Tuesday, April 8, 2008 at 7 PM on WVIA-TV. The public is invited to attend.

Who’s Positive is known nationally for its ability to humanize HIV through first hand accounts of young adults living with HIV. Donohue and his volunteers have successfully empowered thousands of young adults to be tested for HIV. Through the efforts of Who’s Positive, Donohue has testified before the Federal Drug Administration in favor of a rapid, over the counter HIV test. The organization has been featured on CNN and The Logo Network. Most notably, in 2006, Who’s Positive launched the first ever youth driven HIV testing drive and awareness campaign called Operation: Get Tested. Donohue and 6 HIV positive youth traveled across the country sharing their stories and offering free HIV tests at most locations.

“My work could not be any more important,” says Donohue. ”My life has a purpose and that is to help provide a face, a story, a voice of someone who is infected with HIV. I believe that understanding HIV is much more than reading about it from a text book. It’s the understanding that HIV not only infects but it also affects everyone around them,” reports Donohue.

Donohue will join health care workers from Northeastern Pennsylvania as they introduce viewers and the studio audience to the physical, mental and emotional needs of individuals with HIV/AIDS in our regional communities. Infectious Disease Specialist, Dr. Michael Foltzer from Geisinger Medical Center in Danville will participate in the Call the Doctor panel along with Megan Margavage, Case Manager from the Wyoming Valley AIDS Council.

Call the Doctor is moderated by George Thomas. Anyone interested in reserving a seat for this live broadcast can call 570-602-1132 or email: marytheresamazur@wvia.org. Please include the number of seats needed and a contact name and phone number. Viewers may call in questions during the show at 1-800-326-9842. Interested viewers may also e-mail questions and comments to contactctd@wvia.org.

So over the last few months I've had some ehhh non HIV related issues. I believe I had MSRA - a skin infection, long story short I kept getting boils on my butt - several at a time - honestly it was horrible because I sit on my butt a lot when I am flying - no one seemed to know what it was or what to do after two months they all finally went away. But today my roommate told me that he had tested positive for it - they biopsied a boil he had and i figured that's probably the one issue I had - all at the same time I had also came down with Giardia AGAIN - that is a GI issue - a parasite I had that for like two months everything I ate just flushed through me - yeah tough two months - finally the dept of health took me out of work for a few days and I was able to get it cleared up. Then finally on top of it all I have this anal tear - well I actually have had it for a long time but its developed into an anal ulcer. Yeah, it bleeds and drains and all, well the boils and MSRA are all cleared up and on Friday - next week, they are going to put me under and biopsy the anal tear - because it looks weird it has a bunch of what I would call webbing - like five holes and so they are going to put me under in an operating room and really look at it to see what can be done with it. For now I am putting cotton up against it so when it drains it drains into the cotton ball - i know details huh? lol anyway, to the topic, with all this going on my #'s are AWESOME!!

Cd4 732 and viral load not detectable. WOOO WHO!!!

And on top of it I lost nearly 50 pounds and looking really good, just ask Bryan the b/f of now four months. I am really excited bc we are overnighting in Hilton Head in April together - which means that I have to operate a flight into Hilton Head, SC and Bryan is going to fly in and meet me there - we stay at a hotel right off of the ocean and I am really excited to be able to spend some "quality" time with him walking the ocean one nice perk about flying. We've been dating for FOUR months now, although we don't see as much of each other at times but its been really nice to have him there for me down here in VA while going through all this stuff. So honestly things could not be any better at the moment.

Alright - well I am going to get going - I am gonna head to bed, sweet dreams everyone - esp Bryan :)

Tom

Well I am excited to renew my efforts in writing on the Who's Positive blog. Why you may ask? well, because its also being simulcasted on facebook, my own Public Figure page on facebook. Check it out and add yourself to be a fan if you want. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Tom-Donohue/12256382291

Actually, its much more than that. I want to really begin discussions on stuff surrounding HIV/AIDS

Today's topic I wanted to discuss is my medications. I wonder how much you think is my medications are... a month? Well without my insurance it is $1,390.36 thats $14,721.46 a year!

Now there is a program called ADAP AIDS Drug Assistance Program (http://www.kaisernetwork.org/health_cast/player_kff.cfm?id=28#) is a great video on the program

How is it that we have waiting lists? Really? Aren't we like the richest country in the world and we have people on waiting lists waiting for VERY EXPENSIVE medications to help those dying from HIV/AIDS.

I am lucky I am healthy, I have health insurance which covers my medications - it's one of the major reasons I decided to become a flight attendant - so that I could free up funding for others who cant work or don't have the money for their medications. I use the mail service where they mail me 60 days worth of medication for $60 bucks. In comparisons to the nearly $1400 and at times it was $1700 when I lived back in PA.

This is why we must continue to bring this to the forefront - we must contact our elected officials and remind them that its so important for them to fund ADAP program and ask them why its not compeletely funded. I bet if we reduce some of pork barrel funding and reduce our troops fighting in a country thats not even ours we could really help begin taking care of our own people here... in our own country of the United States.

Today I am moved by two completely different experiences related to being HIV positive. I write this with raw emotions, but by humanizing this feeling I hope you too will become disgusted and make your voice heard. Please, take a moment to read this.

First, My name is Tom Donohue, I am the 28 year old founder of a national HIV awareness organization called Who’s Positive. I feel compelled to share these stories with you today.

Today I went to my infectious disease doctors office for an appointment, see I too am HIV positive, so these stories had a great impact on me. While sitting there I noticed an older man sitting in a chair it was oblivious that he was not feeling well. His head was hunched over and appeared drained. Then something happened to me that honestly affected me like no other moment has since being diagnosed in 03. The man began to stand with the assistance of someone else. What frightened me was his look, the way we locked eyes together as if it was saying the end is near. I’m not one to really read ones eyes or facial expressions but this, this truly frightened me and brought tears to my eyes. The man looked at me as frail as one could be and I immediately saw fear. He looked at me as though he knew he was soon to meet his maker, that he had no more fight in him that with the help of others he would barely get out of the chair make his way into one of the rooms to face an admittance to the hospital where he may never return home, where he’d never see his family again, and I, I was the new generation of this fight against HIV/AIDS, that I have the ability to make a difference. In my four plus years of working among people who are living and dying with HIV/AIDS, never had I come so close, so intimately close to death with someone without even saying a word. I sat there in my chair after he was assisted out of the room to sit and think. Hoping that I would never have to go through such an experience, wishing that my family would never see me like that I sat back and feared for my own well being. I’ve thought about this man all day, I don’t know his fate, I hope he is in peace, I hope he is strong wherever he is, at home, in the hospital or with his maker, I just know that with the look in his eyes I’ll never forget why I reach out to my peers, why I help to humanize HIV, why I hope that others can understand that this can happen to others, to anyone. One moment of passion of intimacy of irresponsibility not only changed my life but the lives of so many around me, today a face, a face of someone I never seen before affected me in a way which will give me passion to continue on this mission, I share this story because I hope it too gives you a mission, to understand that your voice, your guidance, your expression can too make a difference and to never give up the fight.

On this same note, let me talk about a disgusting comment that I heard through a YouTube video today. It happened at an McCain debate, some very dedicated individuals interrupted a John McCain stump speech raising signs and yelling “People with AIDS are Dying and your not even trying”. Some may see this as rude, but it was successful, it brought a very needed topic to the forefront, directly to the face of a very influential presidential candidate. I often get frustrated that the media can cover news about a cop that is under the investigation of a disappearance – granted to the families of that person appreciate the attention for it brings attention and pressure on the agencies investigating it, but when tens of thousands of people are being infected with HIV/AIDS and some of them are on waiting lists are dying because there is no funding available to help them get on much needed, and very expensive HIV medications I wonder why HIV/AIDS is only being discussed on World AIDS Day, you see and banner all day on the networks “World AIDS Day 2007” but then on December 2 the banners are gone and the story waits until the following year simply to discuss what should constantly be discussed throughout the year. Well anyway, as these ‘birddoggers’ as they are called, interrupt and are ushered out of the room, peers of mine, fellow American citizens respond to them saying “Not Soon Enough” as if those living with HIV/AIDS are not dying soon enough – check it out for yourself… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xto4HYf3Dks another man went on to say “You know what they need to do to them people? Use some of that uhh advanced interrogation techniques on them” – as if they who were simply trying to bring to the forefront a much needed issue that affects Americans in every state were some mongrels that needed humiliation and torture. Granted they interrupted a speech, of an influential presidential candidate, but wouldn’t you do what ever you could if you, yourself saw the eyes of that man I talked about above try to get better assistance and medical care, or if it was someone you loved or cherished who was positive waiting to get medications on some waiting list, I personally applaud the conviction and dedication of those who stand and use their voice for people like that man I talked about, its them who help bring much needed attention to this cause, directly to the faces of those who make the decisions – rather than meeting with some staffer who takes every issue up they took it to the candidate, they got it in the news, and brought attention to a much needed deadly virus right here in these United States of America, a country with one of the largest infections of HIV/AIDS in the world.

To Mr. McCain who replies after they are escorted out “You know, I’ve always been curious why people like you who live in a free and open society would disrespect one of the most fundamental parts of America, and that is the ability to take part in the conversation with people who aspire to [political] office. I’ll never understand it.” well, its because people like the older man I talked about above who are dying from HIV/AIDS and need your attention and leadership and he and I are lucky to have people who do speak up, its not disrespectful it is passion, its desire, and need to recognize and execute change to make a difference in this fight against HIV/AIDS, guess who can do that, You. Now wonder why they do it.

Thank you Mr and Ms birddoggers for representing me, my friends and people I love who are infected with HIV/AIDS I am sure my new friend above who I will think about for years to come appreciates your voice being heard since his by now may be… silenced.

Happy New Year everyone!

Wow. So many things have happened through 2007. I wish I had blog through much of it but as much as Who's Positive has been in the national spot light, we have to be careful what and how things are told.

Yes, we have restructured. It was the best for us. We still have much to do with the restructuring, much of it no one will see but we continue to thrive and focus on our goal of bringing to the forefront the immediate need to alert young adults of the dangers of irresponsible sexual behaviors.

We are proud to continue to bring our grassroots efforts of nearly five years ago - to simply humanize HIV through first hand accounts of young adults living with HIV to young adults, our programming, probably one of the best in the country does a simple but most important task. Our HIV positive youth bring a face and a story to their peers. Last year we spoke to thousands of young adults and over the last two and a half years we have had nearly three million hits on our website, proving that the message is getting out, that people are listing.

We are excited about the future, we are still looking at launching a National Youth HIV Awareness Day sometime in the future, we will be looking at good days prior to most spring breaks which we can highlight the need for young adults to act responsible during spring breaks while also highlighting the trends of young adults and HIV something that we must continue to do, bring light to this epidemic among young adults.

Look for more information forthcoming!

Tom

This feeling is different, unique, but not something I would or could change for the world. He smiles and well I cant help but to smile back, but my smile seems to be much more then this public display of affection towards him, it seems to be so much more, no I mean it is so much more ¡V something no one else can see or feel, it¡¦s a feeling that warms me, gives me comfort, security and love. Ohh there is no doubt that our affection for each other has slapped us both so quickly but I¡¦ve see a guy that well I think many other¡¦s haven¡¦t seen. I see a guy that I cant wait to see or touch, and hold. We traveled to State College this past week together, he flew for the first time and well, our evening was amazing, he was with me while I sat on this panel discussion, when we got to the hotel, I made him stand outside the room I lit about 20 or so candles all around the room ¡V we got a suite, one of them rooms with a Jacuzzi so I put lots of candles around the edge of the Jacuzzi and I opened the door to this wonderland of candles and kicked off our day/evening with a dip together in the Jacuzzi. Wow, it was relaxing, we held each other and just laid there holding each other. Then we went to the panel discussion where I was one of the panelist, from there we went to the local gay bar where I got to introduce him to some ppl, then went back to the hotel, a little tipsy to find no room service could be ordered, so we settled on Taco Bell. What a night.

I miss him when I am away, I miss his laugh, his smile, his touch, our conversation, but one thing is sure I look forward to seeing him when I come home. I¡¦m happy and well I think we are happy together ƒº